Teeth, comics, and state reports

 I'm lagging behind the ball on recording the min to min gems between a lost tooth, a well done state report on Wisconsin and a new found love for drawing comics. 

So let's start shall we - Ben completed a 26 slide state report on Wisconsin. Its quite interesting the way he has already started to take on homework as if it were a life sentence - pacing back and forth - opening the laptop only to get lost in some online games because he has already predetermined the task at hand to be too difficult. He carries responsibility like a true oldest child. Feeling the pressure of doing everything perfect out the shoot. And worrying there is no lee way for mistakes. He did of course complete his work on time and well done. But not without a few outbursts. Another significant recent event was his priesthood ordination. He wore a tie today for the first time since he was a toddler - put on Sunday shoes instead of sneakers and sat calmly through sacrament meeting-- a first for him really. He seems to growing up right before my eyes. Last week he stood up for a second time to share his testimony during testimony meeting. He is being called as a counselor in his Deacons quorum. He really does look for opportunities to serve. Such a good kid. Will and I are supremely proud of him - his work ethic, intellect and kind heart. We are grateful for him. we love being his parents and look forward to good days to come.

 Dear James is up to lots of drawing. Pages and pages of comic books. He loves humor, and as has been alluded to before he is our upbeat child. His favorite Christmas gift this year- his Fitbit watch. He watches his steps and bounces around to get as many as he can before the end of each day. James has joined the Madison Blackhurst fan club. Ben has always really adored her. And now James just can't get enough of her either. He wants a hug from her the moment she opens her eyes and spent the entire day with her today building blanket forts in her room. They have been so cute. James loves 3rd grade and I would guess it is his third grade teacher who has inspired the comics- she is a dear friend of mine but also a hero of James. Mrs Payne really does inspire her kiddies to dream big and be creative in whatever they endeavor to do. 

Lastly Maddy. She is rocking it in her KoolMinds program- a brain training program that focuses on visual memory and patterning and where you are in space and a lot of other things that might come more natural to some but seem to be a challenge for our sweet Maddy. She also has a mouth half full of baby teeth and half full of permanent teeth- which is really indicative of the stage she is in. Kind of still a little kid but also one foot in the big kid world. She is navigating the cross over well. Her baptism will be in a couple months and she can't wait for it. She is actually looking far beyond that particular step in her journey and has repeatedly says she wants to go on a mission - just like her mom someday- hopefully to the same country I went to she says. She wants to speak Spanish. What a sweet child. I hope and pray her enthusiasm for the gospel carries far beyond these young years.... 

Lets end with Sweet Will and his crazy lady wife. He and I keep busy projecting. I don't know that I knew it before we married that we would both be energized to complete house project after house project- we have lived here in Kaysville for three years now and in that time have totally renovated the two bathrooms, replaced all the floors- had a company replace the carpet, built entry way shelves and garage shelves and storage shelves, we also basically put in a backyard-- including about a dozen new plant species and about six trees (one of them we planted in the front yard). Needless to say we keep busy. I am also working more for the school district helping pave the way for jr high and high school kids in special populations to find their career passions and take those classes before they graduate - I love it because it isn't full time and I can still be mom and wife and etc.... 

Well I better put my kids to bed- so I'll end my post- hopefully will back again sooner than later with another Blackhurst family report. 

Love,

Summer 

So Whats to complain about really....

Not drowning in masks currently but covid is still raging in countries around the world. We went right from covid to heat and extreme drought headliners. We're keeping the grass alive- in a more yellowish state at this point in the time. We're mid summer and the heat has been a little relentless- so we are either indoors or in the rec center pool. We have been busy fixing up the house as usual. This year we put shiplap in our basement and a barn door in our bedroom master bath and some granite countertops in the bathrooms as well as new floors in the bathroom. We built in some shoe shelf's and coat hangers and other shelving in our entryway. We repurposed the build in from an old entertainment center. We're without a shower currently in our master bath because we have sand and swirl coming in to add shower walls after we tore out some of the extra wall, ceiling, and tile the house had from when it was built... Planted some new trees and bushes in the yard... We're really getting in on the make your house a home thing.... 

Lets start with Ben. His 4th grade year had him busy - he already has a hyper focus on good grades even though they don't really give official grades in elementary. He had early morning meetings with robotics and hope squad and loved every minute. He still buries his head in books during school but his quiet sweet ways really do have kids looking up to him and enjoying time with him. When he isn't teasing James to death or vice versa he is the bell of the ball James and Maddy look up to their big brother. Maddy is constantly saying "Mom. I love Ben soooo much!"

James - What a good kid. Keeping us laughing and dreaming up creative ideas like what a traffic system and street lights might look like once we all have flying cars. He is currently in tennis class and soccer in the fall. Ben keeps challenging him to finish Harry Potter - but for now he still just plowing through books like Diary of a Wimpy kid and such. He such a multi layered kid - he is silly and smart and quiet in groups of all things- cause he is so friendly but reserved. Its fun to be around this kid and I can't wait to see everything he will become! 

Maddy has grown leaps and bounds this year. She was a little tricky in her 1st grade class moving around and missing out on her tasks. Toward the end of the year she was more on task and catching up with her peers in the work demanded of your typical 1st grader... She is sleeping better and getting her room cleaned more often and stepping up her after dinner routine of clearing the table as well. Maddy is pretty much the glue that holds us all together. We all are totally all wrapped around her sweet finger. She is sweet and smart and love- she brings us all so much love. 

Will and I - we're holding this whole messy life/family together somehow. I love Will's 6-2:30 schedule working from home- as it makes more time for us and house renos and he exercises almost everyday and helps with the dishes and laundry- he's sort of the perfect husband I didn't know existed. I'm still up and down with the concussion stuff but more up then down :) I'm also still trying to dream up a future career - but currently I'm happy subbing and doing photography and some digital marketing so just hoping to keep that all up enough to pay the bills. Fingers crossed for the rest of my career life but really - I super love the life and family I have so what's to complain about really... 

Keep around and we'll keep you updated

Sincerely,

Summer

ps Maddy is totally taking herself to the restroom now and not having any accidents!!! So yes she did get her Cockapoo - named her Scarlet and we love our cute micro dog so much! 

The next chapter - Pandemic isn't over yet but we are over it

Ben is having a good year so far. He was voted into the Hope squad for the year by his classmates and he loves serving and working in the club. Also a couple boys in the ward asked him to be on the robotics club and he loves meeting every week with them to socialize and build. Everyone who sees him right now instantly says something like "Whoa you are growing so much Ben" or "You look so much older." And I don't know if all the comments promoted premature babysitting tasks but he has been thrown in. About once a week for an hour or two he watches shows with the kiddies and Will and I go grab a soda. On one of our outings we came back to Ben locked into the basement with the kids with some plan of attack in case someone broke in.. he reminds me of me = any noise around my house when I was babysitting and I grabbed my nearest table utensil for support. Ben has had a better year with not getting overwhelmed at school. With such a bright mind and non stop stories running in his brain he doesn't always stop to let his body keep up. I expect great things from this little bugger. The firstborn and leader of our family - kind and driven. 

James is also shooting up like a weed. Almost as tall as Ben in fact. His smile is contagious and he super loves school and reading and cousins and friends. He is my social one, even though he would tell you he is the quiet one in his class - which he isn't wrong he does tend to hang back at school. I substitute teach at his school he really tends to keep his head in the book when he is supposed to and doesn't run out of line to give me a hug like his other two siblings. The last few days he has decided to see if his stories can make Maddy cry so they are always about puppies then something goes terribly wrong... the little stinker. He is so creative. He thinks someday he might become a writer and write really great movies.  

 

Maddy lou - always so much to say about her. The uphill battle of making sure she gets plenty of sleep and exercise and keeping her from getting too overwhelmed about little things. And I think we have found all the tricks. We are getting this girl down to a art. She is actually catching up with her reading and writing - still a tad delayed and most recently it is because of she says she has a hard time concentrating or in her words "I'm so bored!"The good news is she is doing much better than expected in 1st grade. I just hope my faith and hers can keep pushing us all to that better day. And speaking of puppies we've bribed her with a puppy to see if she can put her finishing touches on her potty training. Most of her motor movements are perfected she just needs to get up the inspiration to take herself to the bathroom instead of being prompted... if she does this she will get a cockapoo - so this story is to be continued...  Anywho - her latest interests are whatever the boys are loving currently - so pandas, pokemon, and minecraft educational. She does love detail oriented art projects - she could spend hours poking holes in paper to get the traced out pictures or glueing diamonds onto small pieces of art collages. 

As for Will and I - I picked up substitute teaching and love the kids so so much- but it doesn't always pay the bills so I can't do it forever. I'm sort of having a mid life crisis over what I should be when I grow up. My headaches and neck aches from my accident still plague me so heading full speed ahead back into marketing is probably not in the cards... Will is a stalwart and amazing man - he has wowed everyone with his work ethic this year - pulled out all the stops to help Derik build a deck and put up shiplap in our basement and help my parents with every odd and end. I'm so happy to have the perfect partner. He works so hard and loves me and the kiddies so much. 

Keep tuned for another day and a another letter

The Pandemic continued...

 What a summer! I didn't know it was possible to love and fall in love and then fall in love again with my kiddies. The older they get they go from one phase to another and they are all so cute and fun to talk to. Maddy finally is chiming in with the rest of us. Voicing articulated opinions and whoever is the most passionate wins. Its been fun to see James and Maddy play make believe. Often something to do with a puppy or zombie. Ben chimes in between audible books and establishes that he is the alpha and they love the whole dynamic. Our kiddies are learning to become best friends. Its sort of my favorite thing. So last you heard we were in the middle of a pandemic. Unfortunately we are STILL in the middle of a pandemic. Its become a little less shocking/dramatic/difficult - we aren't afraid as much to breath on our relatives. Or stand on the same backyard porch as them. It was torture being separated from my brothers and sisters and parents like that. There are some people that really took to all the isolation and alone time but I just couldn't. It was really very hard. As the restrictions have lifted a little by little its like my stress lifted off bit by bit. 

By may School called it quits three weeks early and my kiddies and I went from some sergeant sub servant relationship to just being mom of three cute kids trying to do their best. Being vulnerable, learning how to swim, bike, get along with others, dealing with their emotions and all the sudden I'm just a coach watching as their greatness unravels - through all the bumps and hills and mountains they have to climb... 

We spent the summer camping, going to bear lake, swimming every other day at the Clearfield aquatic center and visiting my parents and sisters and brothers. Violet goes with us almost everywhere we go we love that cute dog!

Lets start with Ben. He is growing by leaps and bounds. I told Will the other day that I'm not ready for him to not be a kid anymore. He has to bath everyday and he often babysits his siblings. He is more responsible with the dog than I am. He is a great help around the house and he is kind and really turning in to quite the young man. He still has some angst of course- life comes at him a hundred miles a minute so he gets overwhelmed with new experiences of course. We just started group violin lessons and it totally sets him off to be in a new group setting- so hoping hat works out ok. 

Moving onto James - he is going to be baptized this next month and we haven't even figured out how we are going to baptize him during a pandemic... only a few people will come and I'm sure the program will be short... James continues to be our most outdoorsy kid. He loves to play with other kids and he will do so for hours on end. James is smart and happy and silly and chill and the perfect middle child for our family. I often think he in some ways completes his siblings as they do him. 

Maddy - my little angel Maddy. She has come so far the past few months. It feels like some of the fog is lifting. She is talking so much more and its so cute here are some of her maddisms:

She came up with a really big number: Googleplexaverse
After watching Sonic the hedgehog she says her stuffed animal penjuins new name was: Sonic Twinkie cause he is fast! 
She seems to starts everything nowadays with: "Just so you know twinkie..." and then says what she is feeling
The following is a conversations I over heard between her and James:

J- you thick zombies are real?
M- they are, they are real— I’m not lying
Stuffed animals are real and zombies are real - it’s not too much pretending
J - so they Can come to our house and eat our brains

M- ah huh - and they are invisible

Maddy's stress and the problems sleeping and the difficult transitions - everything seems to be rounding out. She is picking up swimming and biking like a champ. We've been in OT and cranial sacral therapy and are finding some of the tricks to calming her little overwhelmed sensory system. I don't know when the potty training piece will come in but I'm not going to get worked up over it anymore- it is what it is and we will beat it someday. She starts 1st grad in a couple weeks they will go 2 days on and three days off to split up the kids from COVID exposure - this year will be one for the books for a lot of reasons- I'm learning with faith and family we're going to make it- I feel that more now after sort of falling apart this spring with having to homeschool for two months... 

Will and I- I super love him. He is the perfect ying to my yang. He is always up for serving others and our family. Sometimes I wonder if he is ever tired. Always looking for the next project to help with. He made a wood shed, a balance beam and fixed the sprinklers in the last two weeks alone. He is the perfect partner and I are up grateful everyday to have him. We're hoping to move upward and onward with his job, as my hours continue to go down to support my concussion symptoms and more need for therapies with our kiddies. Fingers crossed. 

I'll leave you with some shots from the past couple months adventures... 

Keep with us, 

Love,

Summer 

A Pandemic! WHat?!

So lets start with the Elephant in the room - or in the world. In January I watched a clip of the Chinese government building an entire hospital in 10 days and thought- this is bad.... Fast forward to the middle of March and our entire state of Utah shut down in a matter of mins. The turning point was Tom Hanks being diagnosed with Covid19 and an NBA game being canceled moments before they went on court because a Utah Jazz player had tested positive. Teachers barely had time to react- school doors closed and worksheets and iPads were sent home with parents and my kids and I have been holed up in our house for four weeks so far trying to complete 15-25 assignments between three of the kids on any given day. I've been a mess. I feel betrayed by the teachers - but know they are in shock and powerless just as much as I am to our world being thrown upside down in what felt like a second.

The first couple of weeks I gave myself a lot of pep talks about how I was going to use this time to be a better person and really enjoy my kids- and I have in some ways. Spending time only with my kids and husband- there is no one I would rather be "locked down" with. But the lock down up to this point is more of a game of psychological war fare. Cleaning my hands multiple times an hour, wiping down door handles every-time I come back from the grocery store. We're fighting a deadly bug so small that we have no idea where it is so we have to assume it's everywhere around us and that we have the horrendous potential to infect the people most dear to us - but who are more susceptible to the worse this disease has to offer. It makes instant enemies of strangers. You cross a grocery store isle to avoid people and worry that people are judging you if you stop to say hi to a friend in the parking lot. In Salt Lake County you can get a $1,000 fine for violating social distancing guidelines.

As my anxiety has grown with the day to day pschyological toll I've started to employ more mental health tackle approaches like mindfulness, exercising, calling friends and positive affirmations. These seem to be helping but I'm still a little depressed. I realize this entire situation is exposing chinks in my armor. Weaknesses I had no idea were there. I feel like with the Lord standing near by I'm walking through my own personal fire (I"m sure everyone around me feels the same) but before I'm totally engulfed he reaches for me and brings me through to the next obstacle and then I head back into the fire. I pray that this time of trial refines me and prepares me for everything that is to come. Especially as it concerns to my children. I'm so afraid that they will have to do hard things and they won't be able to do those things - I really push myself and them, but too much. I want to protect them from such difficult realities as a pandemic and for our own personal trials this year as learning to cope with Autism.

As part of this diagnosis childhood anxiety has reared it's ugly head over the last few months. Maddy hasn't been sleeping lately and Ben has moments of being overwhelmed so much that he will just pace and shake a little - about the fear of an earthquake, or the pandemic or overwhelm with too much information - I'm standing beside them coaching them how to get through it but I can't take it away from them and prefer they learn the tricks to becoming resilient to some of the overwhelm that comes with feeling like the world is offering too much information (light, sound, taste, physical, etc...) all at once. Just like I need to learn to walk the tightrope to doing "well" during this difficult - so do they need to learn how to defeat their demons.

I give thanks to our Heavenly Father for not asking us to do this alone, even if I can't be with my own parents at this time. I can be with Him and I can feel Him when I kneel and pray.

I'll end with a quick update about the chillen...


Ben broke his arm on the sidewalk the other week and is sporting a neon green cast for the next few weeks. He has a fascination with nerf gun wars right now and currently is sleeping on his floor in his nerf gun fort. He just finished reading the second book of Harry Potter and when he isn't reading he loves listening to other kid fantasy books on his Alexa. He is learning to control his big emotions and we've made progress with him learning to comply without screaming (this is all with the help of a counselor). He is bright and loved so much by his brother and sister- he is there Hero and generally treats them both so well. He is a really good big brother, most the time ;) !



James has one front tooth that was quick to come in after he lost it and another that just seems to be taking up camp in his gums. His toothless grin right now is so precious. James hasn't complained about not playing with friends- I've been surprised that he is doing so well - even without friends stopping by all the time because of social distancing. He jumps on the tramp and spends a lot of time springing on our furniture too. He also will take any min Ben will give him - Ben likes to hole up in his room a lot, but when he comes out the kids just light up. James is also happy to do his school work everyday- he is the only one who doesn't fight me on it which is such a blessing to me - (I know its being in charge of my kids education that has my mental health on edge.)



Maddy has reverted a little with potty accidents and not being able to sleep- which has been a great source of angst for me as well- but when I take a look closer and let her develop at her own rate - I'm just in love. She is so darling. She says the cutest things. Like when I explained to her she has to go to the bathroom everyday because she drinks everyday - she spent the next three days telling me she wasn't thirsty but then snuck drinks when I wasn't looking :) She also makes a game out of washing her hands during this pandemic. She refuses to wash them without Will or I standing over her singing the abc's with her so she gets them washed thoroughly. Recently she convinced me she would sleep if I bought her a lava lamp so once it arrived she promptly found out she couldn't sleep with it on. She is very determined and has the most difficult time of all my children with change or upset to her schedule. I'm hoping to direct her in ways to promote flexibility but mostly I hope people around her will see around some of these flaws - because when they do they will fall in love too.

Well This is a long entry so I will just end with- my concussion still give me grief and at this stage in the game I'm worried it will for a lifetime - Yikes! And Will is working hard for our family and is truly invested in me and the children - we couldn't be more lucky to have him.


Keep reading and keep praying-

Love,

Summer

Still kickin in 2020

I need to recommit to writing in this blog- its my kids only journal and by golly the world needs to know how cute they are.

Ben is 9 years old - he is crazy responsible and I"ve even got him babysitting the other two for short periods of time. Truth be told however the kid is better at helping direct Maddy to the best next steps then I am. He is a master at getting Maddy to do things she doesn't want to do. This last year we were able to get at the very root of a lot of his stress and as a result he is a much calmer kid- I am so happy about that! Not just for our home but for him- he doesn't feel overwhelmed all the time anymore. The cutie patootie is in counseling currently to teach him to some basic social skills. He's smart and driven and unsure how to communicate with others around him so often he just doesn't. He's on the autism spectrum- and its been interesting to see him stepping into the role- dealing with the life he has been given. I expect great things from him and couldn't be prouder of the person he is.

James is my social butterfly - he pulls in friends by the dozens. He is a little on the shy side however and stays home- instead of go out and see who can play. I don't know if that means he is a homebody or just hesitant to be in new environments. Don't worry though his friends often come knocking and he loves it. James is responsible and is calm. He is also in constant motion. Here in the middle of winter because he can't jump on the trampoline he makes our front room his jumping ground. He is skinny as a rail because of all the motion and eats like a horse.

M\adison - so driven and dynamic. This year she continues to take her place among the siblings as the favorite. The boys protect her and love her hugs. She tells them daily how much she loves them. She also made up her own language - so she says. So far she only has one word developed - but apparently it can mean an infinite number of things "calaascious" - often it means I love you. She has also come far in the last year. We've done a lot to help to "regulate" her - energy work, occupational therapy and most recently ABA therapy. Its crazy to raise someone who is so gifted but so "lost" all in the same moment. She doesn't like anyone telling her what to do and transitions are a bear for her. I have hope though that she'll figure it out. Really we are all here to tame our own beasts and though some peoples mountains seem taller than others - I'm confident the Lord knew what he was doing when he gave her some of her "brain integration" challenges- aka autistic challenges. She will rise to the challenge and I think she'll be a force to be reckoned with some day.

As for Will and I- my brain is still dizzy- I fear that this concussion is here to stay. I have lived in concussion treatments for the past year-- weekly. And all the treatments I have tried haven't really seemed to put a dent in the issues. I still feel like I need Tylenol daily- even though I don't take it daily. Sleep is a little harder for me and work is sometimes fraught with trouble concentrating and multi tasking. I don't know what this means for my future other than I hope and believe my Father in Heaven will pave the way forward. Will is my knight in shinning armor. I am more in love with him now than ever. I'm lucky to be his wife. We believe some of the autistic tendencies came from his cute little gene pool as he is pretty logical and less likely to initiate coverstations and understand all the idiosyncrasies of human interaction. I'm less likely to graduate from medical school though so I think it all equals out in the end. Will was promoted this year and he is slowly creeping up in the pay scale. Every penny helps as our dr appointments have tripled as a family in the past year and aren't slowing down anytime soon. And my income is going down because I'm dizzy or achy or busy with the kids appointments and mine so much of the day.

I think that is all she wrote. We're a healthy and happy family- and feel so blessed to have one another. Our kiddies are so wonderful and we have bright hopes for the future.


Love,

Summer

ps We have also been working crazy to bring our cute new house into this century style wise. Will and his dad have put dozens of hours into installing new floor in our house....